When was the last time you got burned?

In medical terms, when you get burned there is a destructive process that is initiated in which tissues (eg skin) are destroyed and continue to be damaged until the burning process is counteracted/stopped. In basic first aid training they teach you the importance of putting something cold on a burn to stop the burning process.

Something similar happens, metaphorically, when our reputation takes a hit. At those times you are faced with a choice, push back with reality to “stop the burn,” or allow wrong perception to persist along with its damaging effects.

A General Sales Manager relayed the following story to me that gives insight into this concept: 

A customer won a new vehicle from a local casino and came to the dealership to take delivery. In the process of doing paperwork the fleet manager, who did the entire transaction A-Z, disclosed that the odometer showed 371 miles. 

Upon seeing the odometer disclosure the customer stated, “This is bait and switch. I won a new vehicle and you’re trying to give me a used vehicle?!”

The finance manager assured the customer that this was a new vehicle and explained that the dealership had located and traded for the vehicle in order to meet the casino’s specifications in the give-away—the miles were the result of transportation from the other dealer. However, and to appease the upset customer he looked through his inventory and found a similar vehicle, with only 7 miles, albeit with tinted windows. The customer chose the second vehicle and paid the difference for the tinted windows.

During the delivery process the fleet manager explained the satisfaction survey process and asked if there was anything that would keep the customer from giving the store a perfect survey. The customer said that he knew how the survey process worked and not to worry.

To the fleet manager’s chagrin the survey came back with a score of 3.5/5 and included a comment about his “bait and switch” experience.

The fleet manager was upset, said he felt burned, and asked what he could have done different.

After investigating the entire transaction further, including calling the customer to ensure I understood the situation, I shared with the fleet manager the concept of “stopping the burn”.

We have all heard that perception is reality. And, as you know, the perception of most people is that car dealers lie, steal, and cheat. Hence, when they come to a dealership these people are suspicious, defensive, and cautious. We need to be mindful that we are not starting the relationship from a neutral position, but rather in the negative, and need to be extra sensitive to comments and/or behaviors (ours and theirs) that reveal and reinforce a false perception.

So, when the customer suggested that the fleet manager was doing the old bait and switch routine the customer was in effect inflicting a burn on the fleet manager’s dignity and character. And, because the fleet manager did not stand his ground and take offense to the false statement [stopping the burn] he was in effect admitting guilt by default. Like it or not that is the psychology of the matter. It was not surprising then that the burn continued all the way through to the survey.

This is a really important point. If we have good character and don’t lie, steal, and cheat, we should not brush past or smooth over offensive comments that attack our character. To not address these offensive comments reinforces a false perception and that becomes the other person’s reality.

The good news is that we are all endowed with brains that feel or sense when an offense has taken place, no matter how subtle it is. It is incumbent upon you to stop the burn by confidently and tactfully standing your ground and counteracting a burn on your character. Otherwise, this false perception will extend to your public reputation through negative word of mouth, negative reviews, and ‘bad’ surveys beyond the sale itself.

I am convinced that good people who are true to themselves and confidently stand their ground by defending their character will not only gain greater respect immediately (leading to more sales), but enjoy stronger customer relationships, benefit from greater advocacy, receive higher scores on surveys and avoid getting burned.

Go ahead, test my theory, although in your “gut” (limbic brain) you know that I am right.

Herb Mast is a Leadership Coach and Employee Engagement Specialist. Learn how he can assist you in implementing the principles and concepts presented here.